For some women out there, anal action is the cherry on top of the sex
version of an ice cream sundae: a little extra delight that
completes something that was already delicious on its own. But for
others, it's more like pâté: intriguing enough, worth a try, but
absolutely not up their alleys (as in, a penis will probably not be
going up that alley ever again).
We got women who fall on various parts of the anal sex spectrum to share
exactly what it feels like during the act. Read on for their
informative— and sometimes hilarious—opinions.
"If you're backed up or on an empty stomach, it sucks. You definitely
feel like you're going to poop, either all over yourself or on his d*ck.
But if you're not and you do it nice and slowly, it's euphoric. It's
different from regular sex because it feels like he's going way deeper.
Anal doesn't help me orgasm more easily, though." — Madeline R.
"I was always afraid it would hurt, but anal sex actually isn't so much
painful as it is uncomfortable. But! The discomfort is so extreme for
some people that they can barely do it—like my best friend, who's tried a
few times with her fiancé and barely gotten it in, no matter how much
lube they use. The key, apparently, is to be relaxed, which you
really aren't gonna be—in fact, knowing it's about to happen will make
you tense up more than usual —unless you happen to love it. I…do not
love it, but my boyfriend is super into it, and he's very respectful and
lovely about not pressuring me. We maybe do it once every couple of
months. I'm usually a little tipsy, which helps with the relaxation part
and makes the whole thing a little easier. He's a big advocate of using
a buttplug beforehand to 'loosen everything up,' which may or may not
work, but just draws it out more than I'd like." — Anna B.
"It's not the worst thing ever, but kind of like the same way flossing
isn't the worst thing ever. There's nothing fun about it for me. It's
not that it's painful, it's just mildly uncomfortable and really not my
thing." — Jo R.
"I used to be obsessed with anal. At one point in high school, I was
having more anal than regular sex. When done right—and by right I mean
when the guy doesn't shove his d*ck into you like a horse in heat—anal
can teeter on that dangerous line between pleasure and pain . He feels
bigger than ever and completely fills you up. As he's going in, you have
to hold your breath because you feel like your body doesn't have room
for air and his d*ck at the same time, but once he's in, the pleasure
radiates through your whole body. One time, however, my closest
boyfriend and I were walking around my neighborhood and fighting, as per
usual. After coming to no resolution at all, we decided to agree to
disagree and, of course, have hate sex next to a neighbor's house in
broad daylight. He pulled down my shorts and without any warning or
lube, shoved it up there like he was stuffing a cannon to launch it
against his worst enemy. I screamed, 'TAKE IT OUT TAKE IT Out TAKE IT
OUT!!!' Once he was out, I had to pull up my shorts, squat down on the
floor, and meditate so I wouldn't sh*t all over the grass. It literally
felt like he was pulling out my insides along with his penis. The moral
of the story: Hate sex is hot, but hate anal leads to pain and explosive
diarrhea." — Nina T.
"I tried it once a long time ago. The guy I was seeing wanted to do it,
and I was resistant but eventually gave in. He tried to put it in, but
it just hurt too much. I don't think he used lube, and it's just really
tight. Maybe I'd do it again with the right person if I had a lot of
trust in him. Either way, it's not something at the top of my list." —
Clara A.
"Amusingly, my first sexual intercourse was via anal penetration. My
high school sweetheart was raised strictly Catholic and was 'saving
it for marriage.' While I was disinterested in this wait time, he did
explain that anal sex didn't count since it couldn't lead to
procreation. His being exceedingly well-endowed made taking it slowly
and using plenty of lube the obvious choice. The oddest thing I noticed
was that the initial penetration would generate a tight sensation in my
throat, similar to what you might feel after a bad scare. But it was an
exciting feeling, not scary at all. It's a slow but pleasantly luxurious
sensation of being gently and benignly pulled inside out. It certainly
was extremely erotic, and I felt aware of my entire body as an erogenous
zone. I discovered I was able to orgasm via anal penetration, and anal
play is something I enjoy to this day." — Mullens W.
"The key to good anal—yes, that's a thing—is having a partner you trust
completely and who will do it right. That means lots of lube,
start small with a pinky finger just like in Fifty Shades, then work
your way up to small toys or butt plugs. After that, anal can be
amazing! It is super intense, and your lover has to be extremely
delicate and careful and be a good listener and super patient—and you as
the receiver have to have a lot of trust in that. Because the anus is,
after all, an exit, not an entrance, and so it could really, really
hurt. This is not an act that should ever be undertaken with a random
dude or at a random moment; you both have to want it, and you both have
to be prepared. No assholes allowed in the asshole! I think that's one
of the best parts of the whole ordeal. It takes so much time, trust, and
communication that it just amplifies everything physical going on
because you are so connected with your partner." — Tess N.
"For me, being penetrated during anal sex can be a little sore during
insertion and in the first few minutes. Lots of lube, slow, gentle
motions, and patience move it quickly to the next phase, which is an
exciting, pleasurable pressure. I find that I can have stronger orgasms
while being penetrated anally, but these are clitoral or vaginal
orgasms, not anal orgasms—those are quite elusive. For me, it's probably
the added stimulation, the intimacy, and the emotional intensity of
anal that make orgasms stronger. But if the angle is wrong in anal sex,
with too much of a sharp upward or downward angle, a sting-y and
unpleasant pain can be the result.
Having the right angle of entry is important for me. Also, pegging someone with a strap-on can be very pleasurable with an insert-able double- ended dildo, or even just the harness or base of the strap-on grinding up against the clitoris."
— Margaret C. | Women's Health Mag
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